As I have aforesaid, Tommy Two Toes is a guy of fair means and can afford such things as hiring a Shamus to spy on his ever lovin’ wife, but he is also a guy of moral fortitude and has on occasion been known to attend church without being forced by circumstance. During the time his business on the East side is run as a Drum due to the unfortunate restrictions of Prohibition, he spends many a Sunday repenting for his sins. But scratch is scratch and no guy can ever think badly of another for how they come by it, and I am sure the Almighty is equally forgiving, at least that is what you are drawn to inform a guy who worries about such things. Anyhow, these days Prohibition is not so problematic and Tommy Two Toes now turns his repenting to the goings on the first floor of his once Drum now legit gambling establishment, where many a Jane with very loose morals go to rest and takes a guy along for the company for five spots a go, some of which naturally goes to Tommy Two Toes by way of room rent. It is, by all accounts, very popular with the citizens and Tommy Two Toes is known to indulge in a great deal of repenting in between counting his scratch.

So, for a guy of such moral fortitude, it is a matter of great worry to discover your ever lovin’ wife is not so lovin’ and goes often for a rest with another guy. Much more so when the other guy turns out to be lousy with scratch and to boot is non-other than Sammy Spark, second cousin once removed. As he relates this Tommy Two Toes falls into such a state of irreconcilable despondency I call the Jane to bring more joe and warm it up with a shot of corn. And with a fervent wish to turn the subject away from injurious matters, I enquire again after the sudden imperative to use transport other citizens use because I am still none the wiser. At this point Tommy shuffles in his seat and gives me such a hangdog look I seriously regret giving vent to my curiosity and consider if it would be better just to leave the guy to his obvious misery. However, I don’t because my curiosity is roused and I’m currently down on this deal by the price of a couple of cups of joe and the unrealised value of the this and that I’ve put aside for the duration.

The reason for lack of personal transport, it turns out and is related most sorrowfully, is due to it being unfortunately broken and impounded by the Gendarmes pending enquiries into nefarious activities.

Tommy Two Toes explains that Sammy Spark, second cousin once removed’s business dealings, though extremely lucrative, are equally nefarious. So often incurring the displeasure of other less than amenable guys hoping to earn a good days scratch, that on many an occasion he finds himself fingered as the subject of reparation despatched with most extreme prejudice.

“One more hit,” Tommy Two Toes tells me growling into his cup and shrugging off the attentions of the Jane leaning over the counter and batting her peepers at him, “…what concerned citizen would give a daisy may? So I hire a couple of hit guys to pay him an unwelcome visit”.

Unfortunately, the guys he hires refuse to use their own transport or make matters worse for themselves by acquiring some wheels on a temporary basis as ‘it is the little things that a guy ends up in the can for and that outcome is deeply hurtful.’ So, it was Tommy Two Toes’ wheels that are used in the firm belief that he can claim, if asked, that he is a victim of theft and innocent of the whole affair. Tommy Two Toes thinking overall being, he imparts with the sappy eyed look of an abandoned puppy, that he has no wish to upset Mrs Two Toes despite her indiscretion, and being dizzy with the dame, just wants the object of her misguided interest permanently removed.

It occurs to me at this point to point out that it was maybe not luck that he is lacking, but a session with a head doctor. But who am I to make comment on another guys woes? Tommy Two Toes affection for his wheels is the subject of much discussion amongst those who know him and the loss, temporary or otherwise, is a matter of a great deal of hurtfulness to him.

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